“I’m not going to speak about my particular conferences with world leaders. I’m simply not going to try this. This anecdote shouldn’t have been within the guide and as quickly because it was dropped at my consideration, I made positive that that was adjusted.”
— South Dakota Governor Kristi Noem, in response to questions on a gathering she claimed to have had with North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un
It has been dropped at my consideration that my memoir The Fact: My Life, How It Actually Occurred, and What It Means for America—for which I performed greater than 500 hours of interviews with myself—comprises an anecdote wherein the late Samuel Beckett mails me his Nobel Prize for Literature medal and insists, in an extended and heartfelt letter, that I deserve it greater than he does. This anecdote has been adjusted.
It has been dropped at my consideration that my memoir Simply the Info: All the pieces I Ever Did and the Order I Did It In—for which I embedded with myself on a sequence of harmful solo army missions—comprises an anecdote wherein, after a boozy lunch with King Charles III, I invent the iPod. This anecdote has been adjusted.
It has been dropped at my consideration that my memoir You Higher Imagine It: All My Realest Adventures—for which I accompanied myself on many journeys to palaces, embassies, medieval mountain hideaways, international HQs, elite conferences, superstar meditation retreats, and secret underwater laboratories—comprises an anecdote wherein I win Season 14 of Survivor however flip down a subsequent provide (from Jeff Probst himself) to host the present. This anecdote has been adjusted.
It has been dropped at my consideration that my memoir The Honesty Gospel—for which I noticed myself over seven periods of ketamine remedy, supervised on my own—comprises an anecdote wherein I’m visited by the archangel Gabriel. No adjustment has been made to this anecdote.
It has been dropped at my consideration that my memoir No BS: Straight Speak From the Mouth of Actuality—for which I spent a number of months on the set of a documentary about me, directed by me, and starring (as me) each Steve Martin and Eva Longoria—comprises an anecdote wherein I ask the late J. Robert Oppenheimer, “Pay attention, Bob, are you positive you need to break up the atom?” This anecdote has been adjusted.
