Additional to yesterday’s put up, and digitization laying waste to humanity, do you ever get the sensation that you simply’ll at some point be pedaling by means of a blighted hellscape of bricked Vanmoofs and inoperable Chook scooters?
Yea, the time shall come when all these cursed mobility corporations shall go bankrupt. Severed from their deserted apps, these infernal contraptions shall not operate. In all places, legions of the possessed shall fall face first upon the pavement as their conveyances fail:
And on today solely the true believers–those that trip human-powered bicycles–shall be spared. Smugly, we will survey the panorama with perverse satisfaction as we pedal in good circles wherever we select. The clipless, the toe-clipped, and the flat-pedaled alike shall rejoice collectively and forged apart their meaningless variations. The Roadies shall dance with the Retrogrouches. The Bikepackers shall lie with the Stunning Godzillas. Metal and crabon shall not conflict; as an alternative it shall be cast collectively into frames of unparalleled energy and a featherbed trip high quality, laterally stiff and eternally compliant. The Time-Touring Retro-Fred shall lastly return from the Planet Tridork, and a Nice Peace will reign for a thousand years:
Or one thing.
However sure, the times when you may hold a machine going simply so long as you have been in a position to struggle off the rust are disappearing within the rearview mirror, as now they’re all “sensible” and as such must be linked to a central mind:
Fuck it, I’m shopping for a Plymouth:
Thankfully for cyclists, there are nonetheless choices for these of us who refuse to relinquish the simplicity of yesteryear:
The Homer began life as an upright rambler:
But it surely’s since developed right into a form of be-fendered sport roadster and I need to say it excels in its present guise. It feels snug but quick and light-weight on its ft, and between the lengthy wheelbase, the huge gear vary, and the drop bars, hitting the climbs really feels good–you simply roll over that crumbling highway floor and hold downshifting seemingly endlessly with that silky-smooth friction shifter such as you’re sinking right into a thick down mattress cowl.
It actually makes you marvel what all that fancy fashionable highway bike tech is for, type of like while you drink a glass of cool, refreshing water and marvel what the hell the purpose of alkaline water is:
I admit I additionally didn’t know who Andrew Jackson was once I noticed this truck, and within the strategy of discovering out I got here throughout this video of him driving inconsiderately in Tokyo:
He’s a powerful rider and I did my finest to take pleasure in it, however I saved anticipating him to collide with a pedestrian on these little aspect streets, which made me nervous:
However not less than he was carrying a helmet.
